ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
a search helicopter?!
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
