jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
