I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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