I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Randomize
