I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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