I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
