Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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