So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I FOUND THE LEGS
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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