literally had 100 drinks last night.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
