you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize