the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
