And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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