goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
