he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Shame - the story of my life.
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