so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
