Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
