big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
sarcasm needs its own font
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
