Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
