Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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