some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
