So drunk its hurt
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
