STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
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