Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
