I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
