So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
