I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize