don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Randomize
