If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize
