But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
