Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
