Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize