Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize