Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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