I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
