I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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