He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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