Non-Jews are for practice
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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