i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
