he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
