it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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