What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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