Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
