my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
