I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
