Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize