I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize