Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
