he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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