i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
