I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
